FREE MIXING IN ISLAM

FREE MIXING IN ISLAM

What is permissible and what is not ?

What is considered free mixing ?

- Men and women are permitted to be in the same place. (i.e. shops, streets etc)

- Men and women should avoid situations where they are crowded together or seated together.

- Repetitive acquaintance should be avoided to prevent familiarity.

- Business like discussion between man and woman is permissible when necessary.

Why is it like this ?

- Prevention of intimate relationships developing outside of marriage.

- Prevention of gossip and slander that can destroy relationships and families.

- Prevention of one party "falling in love" and being hurt.

- Prevention of children being born outside of marriage.

- Prevention of families being broken up.

The Evidence

Allah (The One & Only God) says: "Nor come nigh to adultery".

Allah (The One God) says: "Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty: that will make for greater purity for them." and says: "And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty." [Noble Quran 24:30-31]

Allah (The One God) says: "And when you ask the ladies for anything, ask them from behind a screen. That makes for greater purity for your hearts and for theirs." [Noble Quran 33:53]

The Holy Prophet (peace be upon him) forbade men and women from being alone together. He said: "Never is a man alone with a woman except that Satan (Devil) is the third party with them."

The Holy Prophet (peace be upon him) also said: "Do not enter into the company of women."

A man then asked him: "What about her male in-laws?"

The Holy Prophet (peace be upon him) replied: "The in-law is the most dangerous".

The Holy Prophet (peace be upon him) also said: "It is better for one of you to be pierced by a steel pin in his head than to touch the hand of a strange woman."

Allah (The One & Only God) says: "Be not too complaisant of speech, lest one in whose heart is a disease should be moved with desire: but speak with a speech (that is) proper." [Noble Quran 33:32].

The Holy Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Any woman who puts on perfume then goes and passes by some men to let them find her scent is a type of adulteress." [Musnad Ahmad, Tirmidhi]

Umm Salamah said: "When the Prophet (peace be upon him) completed the prayer, the women would get up to leave. He would then wait awhile before standing." Ibn Shahab said: "I believe that he waited for a while to give the women an opportunity to depart before the men." [Sahih al-Bukhari]

It was related in al-Bukhari that women at the time of the Holy Prophet (peace be upon him) did not circumambulate the Kabah along with the men. Aishah used to go around the Kabah at a good distance from the men and avoided mixing with them. Once another woman bade to her to go forward with her so they could touch the corner of the Kabah. Aishah refused to do so. [Sahih al-Bukhari]

One of Ayshahs handmaidens came to her and said: "O Mother of believers, I went around the Kabah seven times and touched the corner twice or trice". Ayshah replied: "May Allah not reward you for pushing your way through men. It would have been sufficient for you to you to say "Allah Akbar" as you passed by". [Musnad al-Shafii]

Punishment for Zina

In this life

Fornication is 100 lashes
"The male and female who commit fornication -flog each of them with one hundred lashes, and let not compassion for the two of them keep you from complying with Allahs religion, if you believe in Allah and the Last Day. And let a group of believers witness their punishment." [Noble Quran 24:2]

Adultery is death

The Holy Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "It is not permitted to shed the blood of any Muslim .... Except in three cases: a soul for a soul, the married person who commits adultery, and the one who forsakes his religion..." [Bukhari and Muslim]

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "When someone commits Zina or drinks wine, Allah (The One God) removes his faith from him, just as a person takes his shirt off over his head"

In the Hereafter

The Holy Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "On the Day of Resurrection, Allah will not speak to nor look at nor purify three types of people: an old man who commits Zina, a lying king and a vainglorious poor person...."

The Holy Prophet said: "We went on and arrived near a pit which was like and oven, out of which we could hear cries. We glanced into it and naked men and women, who cried out when the flames reached them from below. I asked: Who are these, O Gabriel? He replied, Males and females who have committed fornication. " [Bukhari]

The Holy Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "If someone commits Zina with a married women, in the grave there will be a punishment on him and on her equal to half the punishment of this Ummah...."

The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "The man who has laid his hand with lust on a woman who is not permissible to him will come on the Day of Judgment with his hand tied to his neck.

If he kissed her, his lips will be cut in the Fire, and if he had sexual intercourse with her, his private parts will speak against him in the Day of Judgment saying: I did what was forbidden.

Allah (The One & Only God) Most High will look at him with anger, and the flesh on his face will sag and he will look haggard and old. He will say: What did I do? His tongue will witness against him saying, I said what was forbidden; his hands will speak and say, We reached for what was forbidden; each of his feet will say. I went to a forbidden place.; and his private parts will say, I did it.

An one of the guardian angels will say, I heard it. and the other guardian angel will say, I wrote it, and Allah Most High will say, I knew it but I concealed it. Then He will say My angels, take him and give him a taste of My punishment. Great is My anger against the man who had so little shame towards Me!"

Khadejah Jones
ShareIslam.com 

Excellent Example of Hijab / Display of body

Excellent Example of Hijab

Please percolate to your Musim & Non-Muslim Contacts 

Ask yourself, or ask the next person who asks you that question, if a female judge walked into the courtroom wearing a tight miniskirt and low-cut blouse, would you take her seriously? Who would you respect more, a woman dressed like that or one dressed modestly? The Holy Qur’an was revealed for all times, and though circumstances change, human nature does not. The fact is that men do like to look at women’s bodies, so a woman who covers herself is more likely to be respected as a person than looked upon as a piece of meat!


Muslim women wear hijab—which is more than just a head cover—because God ordered them to do so in two places in the Holy Qur’an, and because Holy Prophet Muhammad also ordered it. The Holy Quran says in Chapter 24, verses 30 - 31 what means: 


“And O Prophet, enjoin the Believing men to restrain their gazeand guard their private parts. This is a more righteous way for them: Allah has knowledge of what they do. O Prophet, enjoin the Believing men to restrain their gaze and guard their private parts and not to display their adornment except that which is displayed of itself, and to draw their veils over their bosoms and not to display their adornment except before their husbands, their fathers, the fathers of their husbands, their sons and the sons of their husbands (from other wives), their brothers, their brothers' sons, their sisters' sons, their female associates and those in their possession and male attendants incapable of sex desire and those boys who have not yet attained knowledge of sex matters concerning women; also forbid them to stamp their feet on the ground lest their hidden ornaments should be displayed. O Believers, turn all together towards Allah: it is expected that you will attain true success”.


These verses tell us that Islamic dress is not just a matter of covering the head alone, but also of covering the bosom, which is attractive to men, and of lowering the gaze and walking in a way that does not attract attention. Note that the order to lower the gaze was addressed first to men. You can also read the other verse about the same point, which is verse number 59 in Surah 33. 


Up until the end of the nineteenth century, a Western woman who had any self respect covered her head—though perhaps not all her hair—in public. That may be true, but women still know that men look at them. Otherwise, why would they spend millions of dollars every year to style, color, and treat their hair?


                         Is hijab an oppression? 

Dr. Fatima Naseef, author of Women in Islam, sees hijab as a woman’s right to maintain her modesty and to be respected as a person. Please turn the question around to the asker: if one woman has the right to go half naked in public, why doesn’t another woman have the right to cover herself in public? Why is it looked upon as oppression if she chooses to be modest? 

Woman and the display of body

Describing women who are morally decayed. The Holy Prophet Muhammad said that they are "women dressed but naked, corrupt and corrupters, their hairs are like the inclined hump of female camel, they do not enter the Heaven nor smell its fragrance" [Refer to Abu Daud]

The Holy Prophet also said "the prayer of a mistreating woman is not acceptable until she purifies herself" [Refer to Imam Ahmed, Abu Daud & Ibn Maja].

The modern scientific researches confirmed that the nakedness of women, their body displaying & their moving in an obscene shape is a disaster on them. The current statistics showed that there is a clear spread of the malignant cancer which affects the naked and displayed part of the women bodies particularly those women who dress short clothes.

It was published in the British Medical Magazine that "the melanoma malignant cancer which was one of the most rare cancers is now spreading among women. The cases of this type of cancer is increasing among young women. It affects their legs. The medical publication went on saying that the main cause behind the spread of short dress & fashions which expose the body of women to the rays & light of the sun. Moreover, the transparent dress and legs gloves do not help in avoiding this type of cancer.

The Medical Magazine appealed to the environment doctors to participate in collecting information about this type of cancer, because it is becoming an epidemic phenomenon. This reminds us with the Quranic sign which says in the tongue of the obstinate unbeliever

"O God, if this is indeed The Truth from Thee, Rain down on us a shower of stones from the sky, or send us a grievous penalty" [8:32]

Now to torture has come down in the form of a malignant cancer. It is caused by the exposition of women's body to the sunrays and ultraviolet rays for a long time it affects the whole body but with different proportion. Initially, it appears as a dark; small spot on either the foot or the leg, and some times in the eye. Then it spreads all over the body. It attacks the lymph knots at the upper part of the thigh. It also attacks blood and invades the liver & destroys it. It may settle in all the organs of the body such as bones, the belly & perhaps the kidneys. If it attacks the kidneys then the patient will experience black urine as a result of inner destruction of the kidneys. It may get transferred to the child in the womb of his mother.

However, this disease does not allows its patient to survive for a long time & it does not respond to surgical treatment like other types of cancers nor it responds to treatment by rays sessions like some other types of cancers.

Therefore have we realized the wisdom behind Islamic legislation which aimed to protect women not only from passers-by but also from a skin disease called cancer. The subject Islamic legislation called upon women to corner their bodies properly & with loose and not narrow and not transparent clothes.

Therefore, Islamic uniform for women protect them from physical diseases, from teasing in the streets & from the torture of life on the Judgment day.

Source: "Scientific Miracles in Islam & Sunna Nabaweya" .

Muslim Woman and Her Daughter-in-Law / Establishing Islamic Home

The IDEAL MUSLIMAH
The True Islamic Personality of the Muslim Woman 
as Defined in the Qur'an and Sunnah

By  Dr. Muhammad 'Ali Al-Hashimi  
Translated by Nasiruddin Al-Khattab and Revised by Ibrahim
M. Kunna and Abu Aya Sulaiman Abdus-Sabur  

Copyright and published by the International Islamic Publishing House (IIPH), Riyadh, Saudi Arabia in 1999.  

The Ideal Muslimah: the true Islamic personality of the Muslim woman as defined in the Qur'an and Sunnah

The Ideal Muslimah  is proud of the great position that Islam has given her among humanity. She performs her duties knowing that her role is clearly defined and that her rights are still, even today, greater than any other ideology has provided. She is a woman of moral excellence, true to her nature, not confused by alien and morally bankrupt ideas. She preserves her self-respect and dignity through her piety in obedience to Allah (The One & Only God)) and His Messenger (Sall'Allahu alaihi wa sallam). She is the role model that every true believer hopes to emulate.

Chapter 6: The Muslim Woman and Her Sons and Daughters-in-Law

A- Her daughter-in-law and Her attitude towards her daughter-in-law

She respects her and treats her well

The good Muslim mother-in-law respects her daughter-in-law and treats her well; she makes her feel that she is loved and appreciated; she listens to her thoughts and opinions, approving and encouraging those that are good, and gently correcting those that are mistaken. In all of this, the mother-in-law's aim is to be fair and just, so she judges her daughter-in-law exactly as she would judge her daughter if she were in her place giving her opinion to her mother, in accordance with the words of the Qur'an:

"O you who believe! Fear Allah, and [always] say a word directed to the Right." (Holy Qur'an 33:70)

She does not omit to express the joy that she feels from time to time, when she sees that her son is happy with his wife, and this adds to the best feelings that her son and daughter-in-law feel. Similarly, she does not forget to include her daughter-in-law on various occasions, just as she thinks of her daughters, so she lets her accompany them, and makes her feel that she is one of them, and that she is a beloved member of the family since she is married to her beloved son.

In this way the mother-in-law becomes dear to her daughter-in-law, because she shows that her daughter-in-law is dear to her. This is in direct contrast to the practice in those backward, jahili (ignorant) societies that have deviated from the guidance of Allah (The One & Only God), where hatred and despicable plots between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law are the norm, to such an extent that this enmity has become a traditional, inevitable phenomenon, about which there are many folk sayings and popular songs. None of this could have happened if both mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law had really respected one another's rights as outlined by Islam, and had stayed within the limits prescribed by Allah (The One & Only God). This is why the traditional enmity between the mother-in-law and her daughter-in-law disappeared in those societies that truly embraced Islam and adhered to its teachings and values.

She gives advice but does not interfere in their private life

From the moment her daughter-in-law is brought as a bride to her son, the wise Muslim woman remembers that her daughter-in-law has the right to live her married life in all aspects - so long as it remains within the limits of Islamic teaching - and that no-one has the right to interfere in the private life of the spouses except in cases where it is essential to do so, as every Muslim is required to give sincere advice in accordance with the Prophet's words: "Religion is sincere advice (nasihah) ..." ²

The Muslim mother-in-law's standard in her behavior towards her daughter-in-law is her behavior towards her own daughter: just as she wants her daughter to have a happy, successful and independent marriage, undisturbed by any interference in her private life, so she wishes the same for her daughter-in-law, with no exceptions.

2. Sahih Muslim, 2/37, Kitab al-iman, bab bayan an al-din al-nasihah.  

A WOMAN’S REFLECTION

A WOMAN’S REFLECTION

And that He (Allâh) creates the pairs, male and female.
Quran 53:45


   

   
A Woman who wants to be a Woman... 
Written By : A Muslim Woman.
   

   

'Given my privilege as a woman, I only degrade 

Myself by trying to be something I'm not!

And in all honesty--don't want to be: a man. As women, we will never reach true liberation until we stop trying to mimic men, and value the beauty in our own God-given distinctiveness.'

On March 18, 2005 Amina Wadud led the first female-led Jumuah (Friday)

prayer,, in the History of Islam and the universe ( in a Church)!!

 

Where some women prayed without their Hijab and others prayed 
with their tight jeans; stuck shoulder to shoulder with men!!  

Abu Hurairah observed that the Holy Prophet said:" In the latter days there will be imposters, liars, who will come to you with stories which you have never heard, neither you nor your forefathers. Beware then, beware!! Let them NOT lead you astray, nor let them put you into trouble" (Muslim)

On that day women took a huge step towards being more like men.

But, did we come closer to actualizing our God given liberation? 

I Don't think So!

What we so often forget is that God has honored the woman by giving her value in relation to God not in relation to men. But as western feminism erases God from the scene, there are no standard left but men. 

As a result the western feminist is forced to find her value in relation to a man. And in so doing she has accepted a faulty assumption. She has accepted that man is the standard, and thus a woman can never be a full human being until she becomes just like a man-the standard.

When a man cut his hair short, she wanted to cut her hair short. 

When a man joined the army, she wanted to join the army. She wanted

these things for no other reason than because the 'standard' had it.

What she didn't recognize was that God dignifies both men 

and women in their distinctiveness—not their sameness. 

And on March 18, Some Muslim women made the very same mistake.

For 1400 years there has been a consensus of the scholars that men are to lead prayer. As a Muslim woman, why does this matter? The one who leads prayer is not spiritually superior in any way. 

Surely the men who submit and the women who submit, and the believing men and the believing women, and the obeying men and the obeying women, and the truthful men and the truthful women, and the patient men and the patient women and the humble men and the humble women, and the almsgiving men and the almsgiving women, and the fasting men and the fasting women, and the men who guard their private parts and the women who guard, and the men who remember Allah much and the women who remember-- Allah has prepared for them forgiveness and a mighty reward. 

Quran 33:35

Something is not better just because a man does it.

And leading prayer is not better, just because it's leading!!

Had it been the role of women or had it been more divine, why wouldn't the Holy Prophet have asked Khadija or Fatima, or Ayesha may Allah be pleased with all - the greatest women of all time- to lead?

Let those beware who go against his orders (the Messenger's order),

lest some trial befall them, or a grievous penalty be inflicted on them. 

Quran 24:63

These women were promised heaven-and yet they never lead prayer.

But now for the first time in 1400 years, we look at a man leading prayer and we think, 'That's not fair.' We think so although God has given no special privilege to the one who leads. The imam is no higher in the eyes of God than the one who prays behind.

O mankind! We created you from a single (pair) of a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that ye may know each other. Verily the most honoured of you in the sight of Allah is  the most righteous of you. Verily, Allâh is All-Knowing, All-Aware.

Quran 49:13

On the other hand, only a woman can be a mother. And God has given special privilege to a mother. The Holy Prophet taught us that heaven lies at the feet of mothers. But no matter what a man does he can never be a mother. So why is that not unfair?

A Women is a reason to be protected from hell and to enter heaven! 
The Holy Prophet said:“Whoever has three daughters or sisters, or two daughters of two sisters, and lives along with them in a good manner, and has patience with them, and fears Allah with regard to them will enter Paradise.” (Reported by Abu Dawud, Al-Tirmidhee and others)

 Respect of women is Not an Option but a Must! The Holy Prophet

said: "I urge you to treat women well" - (Sahih Al Bukhari)

 

When asked who is most deserving of our kind treatment? The Holy Prophet replied 'your mother' three times before saying 'your father' only once.Isn't that sexist? No matter what a man does he will never be able to have the status of a mother.

And yet even when God honors us with something uniquely feminine, we are too busy trying to find our worth in reference to men, to value it-or even notice. We too have accepted men as the standard; so anything uniquely feminine is, by definition, inferior. Being sensitive is an insult, becoming a mother- a degradation.

In the battle between stoic rationality (considered masculine) and self-less compassion (considered feminine), rationality reigns supreme. As soon as we accept that everything a man has and does is better, all that follows is just a knee jerk reaction: if men have it-we want it too. If men pray in the front rows, we assume this is better, so we want to pray in the front rows too. If men lead prayer, we assume the imam is closer to God, so we want to lead prayer too. Somewhere along the line we've accepted the notion that having a position of worldly leadership is some indication of one's position with God!!

And not your wealth nor your children, are the things which bring you near Us in station, but whoever believes and does good, these it is for whom is a double reward for what they do, and they shall be secure in the highest places. 

Quran 34:37

A Muslim woman does not need to degrade herself in this way. She has God 

as a standard.. She has God to give her value; she doesn't need a man.

In fact, in our crusade to follow men, we, as women, never even stopped to examine the possibility that what we have is better for us. In some cases we even gave up what was higher only to be like men.

Fifty years ago, society told us that men were superior because they left the home to work in factories. We were mothers. And yet, we were told that it was women's liberation to abandon the raising of another human being in order to work on a machine. We accepted that working in a factory was superior to raising the Foundation of society - just because a man did it.

Then after working, we were expected to be superhuman-the perfect mother, 

the perfect wife, the perfect homemaker -and have the perfect career. 

And while there is nothing wrong, by definition, with a woman having a career, we soon came to realize what we had sacrificed by blindly mimicking men.We watched as our children became strangers and soon recognized the privilege we'd given up. And so only now-given the choice-women in the West are choosing to stay home to raise their children.

According to the United States Department of Agriculture, only 31 percent of mothers with babies, and 18 percent of mothers with two or more children, are working full-time.

And of those working mothers, a survey conducted by Parenting Magazine in 2000, found that 93% of them say they would rather be home with their kids, but are compelled to work due to 'financial obligations'. These 'obligations' are imposed on women by the gender sameness of the modern West, and removed from women by the gender distinctiveness of Islam.

It took women in the West almost a century of experimentation to realize a privilege given to Muslim women 1400 years ago. Given my privilege as a woman, I only degrade myself by trying to be something I'm not--and in all honesty--don't want to be: a man. As women, we will never reach true liberation until we stop trying to mimic men, and value the beauty in our own God-given distinctiveness.

If given a choice between stoic justice 

and compassion, I choose compassion!

And if given a choice between worldly leadership

and heaven at my feet - I choose Heaven!

They intend to put out the Light of Allâh with their mouths. But Allâh 
will bring His Light to perfection even though the disbelievers hate (it).
Quran 61:8